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1. The Mirror Rearview; Report # 5
October 11, 2018


Special Report # 5: Stephen P. Bye; Correspondent for the Mirror Review, a fictional newspaper in Laicos County, an imaginary USA municipality. (October 11, 2018) This reporter investigated Round Trip Fields, the third Laicos County golf course that I’ve played since the implementation of the new golf policies by Lester “Duff” Hacker, the recently appointed Laicos County Golf Manager. For many years, Round Trip Fields has been rated in the toughest 100 courses in the U.S. by at least three golf magazines, so I was keenly interested in how Hacker had transitioned the course to entice new a... (read more)

Author: Stephen Bye

2. The Mirror Rearview; Report # 4
October 01, 2018


Special Report # 4: Stephen P. Bye; Correspondent for the Mirror Rearview, a fictional newspaper in Laicos County, USA. (September 28, 2018) This reporter played Sausage Creek Links yesterday. I wanted to compare it with Hammer Valley Club that I tried to play two weeks ago when I gave up after one hole. To avoid being matched with beginners again, I scanned the online tee sheet, and observed open tee times on the back nine holes before nine o’clock, so I elected to just show up at seven-thirty. I remitted the ten-dollar green fee to the new golf professional; whose was appropriately... (read more)

Author: Stephen Bye

3. AN INCONGRUOUS JUXTAPOSITION OF INCOMPATIBILITIES
September 22, 2018


The title of this essay is a verbal description of the two theater masks: Comedy and Tragedy. The masks and title verbiage validate that conflict is required to satisfy both; that is, the formula for writing comedy and tragedy is the same. Check out your next Hallmark Channel romantic comedy, and observe the formula in action, as follows: boy-meets-girl; conflict; conflict resolved; boy-gets-girl; new conflict; boy-loses-girl; conflict resolved with reconciliation; boy-gets-girl. For tragedy, there would be resolution, but no reconciliation (often through ironic misunderstanding), and bo... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

4. Looking Forward Through The Rear View Mirror...The Mirror Rearview
September 13, 2018


Special Report #3: Stephen P. Bye; Correspondent for the Mirror Rearview, a fictional newspaper in Laicos County, USA. (September 13, 2018) This reporter decided to play Hammer Creek Club yesterday to evaluate the ongoing changes implemented by Lester “Duff” Hacker over the past month, since beginning his new position as Laicos County Golf Manager. I decided to play as a single golfer and made an online tee time at 9 AM for nine holes of golf. As I drove into the facility, I immediately noticed that the main billboard was gone, as well as several advertising signs bordering the parking lo... (read more)

Author: Stephen Bye

5. WHAT, ME WORRY?
September 11, 2018


When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. Jonathan Swift – THOUGHTS ON VARIOUS SUBJECTS MORAL AND DIVERTING You know, folks, I’m a pretty mellow guy. When OFF the clock, I’m so laidback that one fellow I worked with referred to me as, Cool Breeze. I like to sit back, relax, have a cocktail, and chill. Live-and-let-live, you know? Like Johnny Mercer advised, I accentuate the positive, and eliminate the negative. Some people resent that. They think I should be full of angst and going bonkers because... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

6. Looking Forward Through The Rear View Mirror
August 29, 2018


Special Report #2: Stephen P. Bye; Correspondent for the Mirror Rearview, a fictional newspaper in Laicos County, USA. (August 29, 2016) This reporter interviewed Lester “Duff” Hacker, who was recently appointed as Laicos County Golf Manager. Two weeks ago, the County commissioners voted to terminate a ten-year old management contract with Golf Really Incredible Management (GRIM) for the three County golf courses and approved a new position of County Golf Manager. Hacker is a twenty year County employee, who most recently, was a senior manager in the County’s waste management division. ... (read more)

Author: Stephen Bye

7. Looking Through The Rear View Mirror
August 20, 2018


Welcome to my first blog. In this fictional presentation, I take the role of a reporter for the Mirror Rearview, a news service that covers the satirical events in Laicos County, an imaginary municipality in the United States. This blog will be updated at least twice per month. Special Report: Stephen P. Bye, correspondent for the Mirror Rearview. (August 16, 2018) This reporter has learned that the Laicos County Commissioners have held secret meetings over the past six months regarding the operation of the three municipal golf courses. A subcommittee, headed by County Ex... (read more)

Author: Stephen Bye

8. ADOPH'S DRUM ROOM
July 29, 2018


ONCE UPON A TIME…many decades ago there existed a tavern that was a weekend hub of activity for young adults, college age and up. The joint was located in the northwest corner of a Midwestern state. Booze flowed freely all days except Sunday. Fridays and Saturdays the place was two floors of elbow-to-elbow merriment. People dressed better then: men in coats-and-ties; women in cocktail dresses—all well-groomed. Other signs of the time: the sound of a flicked Zippo, and cigarette smoke filling the air—gasp, wheeze, cough, choke. (Sound effects courtesy of Al Capp.) That tavern was ADOLPH’S.... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

9. REINCARNATION or Am I Finishing My Grandfather's Life?
July 12, 2018


I once wrote a sappy coming-of-age essay entitled "Lake of Love", which was published nationally April 18, 2010. For the curious, it’s available on my author’s page(s). The article described, among other things, my first kiss—and what a breathtaking moment it was! Hoo-hah! In some ways, an event like that could be considered a restart of one’s life—certainly the end of childhood; and the beginning of a new exciting (we think) chapter. Why exciting? Well, we humans are an optimistic lot. As teenagers we tend to think nothing but good lies ahead: high school sports, love affairs, college degrees... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

10. MUSIC & MOTHERS
May 11, 2018


You know, folks, I have a pretty tranquil life. I exercise, play tennis, swim; and will soon get back to running. I had to stop the latter because of sporadic hip pain that (now) seems to be abating. In addition, I practice piano, and have lately acquired (to my wife’s “delight”—NOT!) a trombone, which I am only allowed to practice when she is out. One conversation went like this: “That’s annoying and way too loud.” She held her ears, and made a painful face. “I’m only playing what’s written.” I squinted at the bass clef chart to see if that was true. “No, you’re playing what’s ... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

11. BATTLE WITH A BIDET
December 20, 2017


So, here’s the deal: I was living in Riyadh, Kingdom of Saudi Arabia (KSA) trying to work a deal with the younger Khashoggi brother, Amr, to sell an oil additive to (among others) ARAMCO, the KSA national oil company, and YUSEF BIN ACHMED KANOO, a giant ocean transport corporation. I admit that selling an oil product to the Arabs was akin to selling ice to eskimos. Then again, it was an adventure; and I’m always up for adventures. My well-appointed flat was located on the fifth floor of the Al Khozama Towers adjacent to the Al Khozama Hotel. I was the first occupant, and the suite was sp... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

12. CHRISTMAS: A HALLMARK MYTH?
December 02, 2017


I grew up in the Midwest during the end of what climatologists call the Little Ice Age; a short period of time when the Northern Hemisphere was supposedly much colder than normal. What I recall about winter, up through my undergraduate college days, are frequent cold snaps and snow falling shortly after Thanksgiving accompanied by a season-long hard freeze. We built snowmen, had snowball fights and sledded down a hill at the local cemetery for the entire month of December. Snow continued to fall throughout the month, and rivers, lakes, and ponds were solid enough to support ice skating—and/or ... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

13. Silver's History of Purity and Warding Off Evil
October 30, 2017


With Halloween upon us, it is time to brush up on our knowledge of which fictional monsters are susceptible to the effects of silver and the origin of many uses. Silver is often represented in folklore and contemporary fiction as an effective defense against werewolves, but vampires and many other frightful creatures are vulnerable to silver’s effects. Since ancient times, silver has been associated with purity and the moon. Ancient literature is brimming with mentions of silver and attributions to magical powers, antidotes to illnesses, lunar deities, bringing good luck, and protection again... (read more)

Author: Edward Wayne

14. REFORMATION or How Politicians screwed-up the System
September 25, 2017


It is basic human nature to make simple things complicated because so-called big-brained intellectuals get paid a lot of money to offer convoluted, and often times conflicting, explanations for simple matters. We seem to like complications in order to deny and/or avoid the truth. Even though in a past life as a consultant I’ve taken part in this charade, I am a believer of Occam’s (or Ockham’s) Razor which states the simplest or most obvious explanation is the correct one. Here we go— The theme of high school and college graduation snore-fest speeches, since before I was born, and probabl... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

15. Consequences of Time
August 06, 2017


At first I didn’t think it was a big deal. I told myself that I must have glanced away for a split second. Surely my skills couldn’t have deteriorated that much. Could they? I mean, I realize I’m no longer 25-years-old, but still-- Worse was the unfamiliar doubt that filled my head; doubt that nags to this day. Here’s the deal: In any sport, especially those demanding hand-to-eye coordination, there are three main components: conditioning, mental toughness, and physical skill. In my opinion, the mental part is where the bugaboos first step to the plate. See, physically you know what to... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

16. The Keurig Saga
July 08, 2017


We all get awesome wedding gifts. One of mine forty years ago was a Farberware coffee pot. It was an 8 cup perk and it cranked out wonderful coffee for a year or so. It met its' demise through Babcie, my mother-in-law. She was a devoted instant coffee drinker. So, the weekend that my parents came to visit, she filled the Farberware with water and put it on the stove to heat the water. She wanted us to have fresh coffee when we got up but confused the two methods of making it. My dad was first up. He hit the top of the stairs and smelled the acrid odor of the burning pot, flew down to t... (read more)

Author: Margot Howe

17. Amateur in the Kitchen
July 03, 2017


bakeware sets.   You can visit her site at http://www.BakewareSetsPlus.com.">I don't remember the first time my mother plopped me on the counter so I could help stir a batch of cookies. But I'm willing to bet that most everyone remembers their first unaccompanied foray into the kitchen. Mine came at age seven. Playing hookey from school (a sore throat or something similar) I had my heart set on whoopee pies. I'd seen enough of these marvelous chocolaty sandwiches come out of the oven. It sure looked easy enough. Reading the recipe was a cinch, but somehow my mind transposed 2 cups of flou... (read more)

Author: Margot Howe

18. My Last Day?
June 18, 2017


I awoke at 5:37 AM feeling well-rested and content, but rather peculiar without knowing why. Something was definitely off—not weird off, but like a revelation was about to be disclosed. As I opened the plantation shutters to the rising sun, there was a certain glow bouncing off terracotta roof tiles that reminded me of the Mediterranean. I thought of the French Riviera, and wished I could be there again, but this time as a young man during the 1950s before the turmoil of invading refugees from the Middle East: the velvet sea, the gay nightlife at the cafes on the waterfront, music in the air—j... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

19. The Martini Month of May
June 05, 2017


Well, May 2017 is behind us, and I am happy to report that I successfully fulfilled a ritual my brothers and I observe the twenty-second of every May—and will continue to fulfill as long as we remain in the quick. So far, the streak is twelve years. A word of explanation. My father enjoyed a martini or two when he relaxed after a hard day at work or following a fun-filled afternoon on the golf course. Now, I can already hear some of you ask, “What kind of martini?” Being a purist, I happen to know—though you may not—that I’ve already answered your question. You see, a martini consists of ... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

20. The Trump Card
January 22, 2017


The following essay is not intended to either sway opinion, insult, or convert anyone to my thought process. It is simply an unfiltered opinion relating to recent national issues as analyzed by me. And who among humanity doesn’t want to hear my opinion? If not, read no further. Easy, huh? So, here we are months after the presidential vote, and a new leader has been installed. Still, most of what I see and hear on television / radio news shows, NPR, and read in print has to do with sobbing, complaining, swearing, and hand-wringing over the results. As much as I enjoy the asinine far left ... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

21. Hate & Discontent: The New American Paradigm
January 11, 2017


With the conclusion of the bitterly contested 2016 national and state elections, do you speculate whether or not the country can return to an environment that resembles “normal”, whatever that is? I’m thinking, probably not. What a comic opera. We had two divisive lightning-rod presidential candidates representing the two major parties who, with their minions, seemed to divide the country even further. It was apparent that no outcome would be deemed acceptable much less satisfactory given the choice voters had to make. The result was stunning and unexpected—sort of an O. Henr... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

22. The Reluctant Yogi of CantaMia
October 18, 2016


I enjoy an active lifestyle in the community of CantaMia, nestled in the Estrella Mountains near Goodyear, Arizona; and (almost) admit to being in denial about the ravages of age. However, deny as I might, insidiously, little things creep in. A winking, grinning imposter shows up in my mirror. (Hey, how ya doin’?) Reminders of old injuries and surgeries ominously surface in occasional shoulder, knee, and hip pains. On the tennis court my eyes pick up the ball slower than I remember, which sometimes results in faulty footwork. Shot quality and direction suffers. Frustrating, y’know? By-an... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

23. One Evening in Goodyear, Arizona
September 24, 2016


In 2015, Kay and I moved to CantaMia in the Estrella Mountains near Goodyear, Arizona. It’s a 55-plus, gated community, with a resort atmosphere and inhabited by active people playing golf, tennis, pickleball, bocci ball; and keeping fit in the gym, practicing yoga, and lap swimming. During the afternoon and evenings there is a definite party atmosphere. In other words, it fits my particular lifestyle. With that in mind, one of the ladies recently celebrated a milestone birthday so to commemorate the occasion, 30 (or so) of us decided one Friday afternoon to travel down-the-hill to a ven... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

24. One-Eighth of a Tank
July 11, 2016


Elmer Fudd answered, "Simple, Bugs, when I put on my right shoe, the other one is left." WHA...??? I crumpled the small, waxed-paper comic strip and threw it toward a nearby trash bin. I didn't "get" the joke; and something else was off: mainly, in that comic strip, Elmer Fudd didn't substitute w's for r's like he did on the screen when Mel Blanc gave him voice for the Warner Brothers animated shorts. I was six-years-old sitting on a wooden pallet behind McBroom's Grocery Store. I had purchased, for a penny, a wad of bubblegum. I think it was Double Bubble because of the Bugs Bunny ... (read more)

Author: Gene Myers

25. CSI 18b-The Case of the Deadbeat Beauty
April 14, 2016


Not everything always works out in Forensicland. Sometimes we strike out. In more ways than one. I was gazing out the tall windows of my office at the blue, blue Santa Barbara sky, with nary a cloud in sight. It was my 50-something birthday. The bills were ignored. It seemed like a perfect day. Then the phone rang and a delightful voice answered. Ginger Justín. She laughed; she loved my jokes; she thought I was brilliant. She said I was perfect for her. As an expert. I reminded her of her dad. Her deceased dad. I should have taken the cue. It seems that Ms. Justín’s dad had pa... (read more)

Author: Steve Burgess



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